Growthtrac insidetrac, Life Changing Marriage Resources

Podcast #20

Important Please Read

• Our Story: Dom and Kathy Read the Interview
• Introducing Growthtrac Radio!
• The Divine Mentor 

The Top Ten Myths of Divorce

From Rutgers, Discussion of the most common misinformation about divorce.

Me, My or We

The words “me” or “my” have no place in marriage. They are selfish words.

Some examples —

• I expect someone to share my burdens, concerns, joy and laughter – often
• I expect someone to support me emotionally, financially and spiritually
• I expect someone to reflect my tastes and values
• I expect someone to amplify my strengths and offset my weaknesses
• I expect someone to be responsible for my personal happiness and complete me
• I expect someone to know my every thought before I say it

Each time the word me or my is used, it leaves out the word we. Let’s take a different look at the statements above —

• We can share burdens, concerns, joy and laughter together – often
• We can support each other emotionally, financially and spiritually
• We can work toward understanding each other’s tastes and values
• We can build up each other’s strengths and allow God to work on our weaknesses.
• We can work at building each other up with words of kindness that bring happiness to each other.
• We understand that building communication skills are important and we cannot read the other’s mind.

When the word we is exchanged for my, the dynamics change and so does the focus.

In marriage, there is only one place where the word my can be used —

I am responsible for growing my relationship with God and spending time in the Word — daily. It’s my responsibility — no one else’s.

This one single responsibility makes a difference between a marriage that thrives and a marriage that dies.

My choice.

Dads: Time is Slipping Away...

A friend of mine copied me on a bedtime dialog he had with his girls the other night. My daughters are grown and it struck me how fast they're off to college and married and how we -- especially dads -- need to slow down and value every minute. Enjoy.

At times, when I’m tucking in my eight-year-old daughter, Jenna, or just walking with her hand-in-hand, I’ll say something like this to her:

“You know, Jenna, if they lined up all the little girls in the world and told me I could have my pick of any one of them to be my daughter, I’d look them all over…and I’d pick you”.

I wish the sentiment was original with me, but I have to admit that I heard it before somewhere else.  Still, it’s a sweet way to let my little girl know that she is precious, special and irreplaceable to me.

Tonight, Jenna tried to return the favor to me.  She said,

“You know, Daddy, If they lined up all the daddies in the world for me to pick from, and you were there, and if one of them looked like a penguin, do you think I would pick that one?”

At first I was taken aback and a little confused with her version of it, but I responded, playfully, “Yes”.

Jenna replied,

“No…I’d pick you.”  Then she added, “Even though I really love penguins.”

Well, it’s good to know I made the cut…even though I was apparently almost beaten out by a penguin.

The Latest Media Scandel

This is a bit off our usual marriage trac, but this caught my eye and need to share with you. Blogger LaShawn Barber commented today about a media scandal related to some unpopular -- perhaps out of context -- Christian-related comments made by Ann Coulter.

What I love most about this particular post (and LaShawn in general) is that she tells it like it is. This time LaShawn expressed quite clearly, with no excuses: who Jesus is, why we need him, and how to receive Jesus in to our lives so our sins will be forgiven.

Good Stuff.

Read LaShawn's post here

Heaven Overrated?

The Way I See It #230
"Heaven is totally overrated. It seems boring. Clouds, listening to people play the harp. It should be somewhere you can’t wait to go, like a luxury hotel. Maybe blue skies and soft music were enough to keep people in line in the 17th century, but Heaven has to step it up a bit. They’re basically getting by because they only have to be better than Hell."

-- Joel Stein
Columnist for the Los Angeles Times.

The Starbucks' The Way I See It campaign features author quotes like the one above.

• What do you think? Is heaven overrated?
• Are you looking forward to heaven?